Olympic tea pouring competition

My grandmother was multi skilled sportswoman. Not only did she ride Irish ponies, but was Childwall Bowls champion too. If that wasn't illustrious enough, she could also - using her special competition teapot, pour a cup of Lady Grey from the height of 1.2 metres without spilling a drop.

I propose tea pouring at Olympic level. The tea pouring contest could then be followed by the biscuit dunk. This would be divided into sprint, medium distance and endurance. The sprints would take place with Jaffa Cakes - contentious maybe as they are called cakes and not biscuits. This would just add to the excitement. Next, digestives and finally the real test of stamina would take place with Rich Tea biscuits. In an experienced hand, these biscuits have been known to stay dunked for a full 45 seconds without breaking off and sinking into the murky depth of a cup of milky Ceylon.

Lastly, I'd like to propose solo synchronised swimming. This would entail splashing around in a pool and saying, "Lookatmelookatmelookatme". Whoever could do this most effectively would be the winner.